mi mundo en ti.

i don't want to forgive you.
no quiero perdonarme.
nada, huelo
me quiero inclinar sobre ti mientras andamos en el metro.
no quiero nunca llegar
ningún destino
solo caminar, contigo.

yo no escribo poemas
escribo cartas de amor
mensajes de dolor.
me quiero quedar callada
que me vengas a buscar en este seco desierto.
irme, todavía mas lejos. y,
jalar-te
hacia acá, hacia acá.
cuerdas invisibles.
lineas directas
paralelas
distintas velocidades.

no recuerdo tu mirada
mucho menos por que reñimos.
Hay fantasmas que me llaman la atención
con deshonras.
El amor no es venganza.
Débiles los que buscan silenciar el dolor con gestos apresurados.
Yo quiero callar mi boca, para que de ese modo el mundo grite.
Quiero que tu seas ese mundo
habitar en tu hombro
mientras somos
nosotros, cuerpos en movimiento.

flor . muerte

1.*
Brotan hongos de mi cuerpo.
no quiero agua ni medicina.
Los pétalos se han caído.
Me apresure hacia el día de mi muerte,
me parecía una bonita dirección.
De un salto impulse mis raíces fuera de la maceta
y sin sarcófago ahí afuera
me quede.
Por tres años los alegres bailaron
junto a mi cuerpo.
Los necios me daban de beber.
Y tu,
y tu me llamabas.
Eras la luz que me tocaba.
Muerta yo soñaba
ciega ante tu luz.
Ciega, yo soñaba.

Asesina. Fuiste,
asesina.
Vamos quebrando esas macetas ,
una a una, al piso
que quiebra.
Míralas
deslizarse hacia su muerte.
Asesina déjalas ser polvo
y como polvo viajar al horizonte
directo a lo que no es un nuevo mundo. ¿Que es?
¡¿A donde vas?! Asesina,
¿A donde es que vas cuando tu cuerpo ya no pesa?

Yo mate la vida,
Acaricie una vida.
Me mordió esa vida.
Te bese, vida.
Me cagaste el corazón vida.
Cubriré mis ojos con khol negra e iré a tu entierro
vida.

Jamas pose
ni mi alma ni mis pies en un jardín
Jamas tuve maceta
Mis raíces no te encuentran vida
perdida me convertí en  asesina.

despavorida de la luz, me corro
inútil frío no logro quemarme
solo espero poder estrellarme.

Queen of nothing.

No one ever called you princess because you were born a queen. Queen of what? Queen of nothing. Nothing to domain, not even yourself. You are born in dignity, no matter what. No matter, whatever, let them loose. Achieve something that doesn't matter. Human nature, scratch the human, leave the nature. It is all words. No matter. We are made of matter, scratch the matter and there you are, with all the rest. I am God. You don't believe in me because you don't believe in yourself.

Princesses are governed by their mothers and fathers, they obey to that omnipresent creator. Had you not created me, I'd still exist. Had I be given no name, had you never called me, I'd still be. I am not in the I. I am not in your love. I am near. No one dares to have me. No one dares to take me. No one dares to love me. Don't you dare, i will never leave you, I was never with you. I am with all of them, them natural beings.

First, I lived on silly books.
Then I moved to Buenos Aires.
Then I went back home, Quito, and I ravelled.
I fucked and I spit. And I took drugs.
I love you them all, but then I left you. Just like so many have left me.
Now I live in Lima, and now I know South America sucks.
I'm not pissing my pants anymore.
Queen of no domains.
Queen without rule.
Between discipline and nature I choose nature.
I could go to Europe and see the one that sucks is me.
And I might just do that.
But I should just decide, to hide
in a tree.
Hide from my unsensitive socialité dreams.

I am a Queen and the only order I will give
will be to myself, when I finally say
'Off with my own head'

It is about what is underneath our organs. Every morning I wake up wishing I would just die, I hear the words come out of your mouth and I say ‘Craaaa aaa aaap!’. Then I’m out, buildings are falling because homes never rose. I just glance at shit, broken roads, bad weeds, beggars everywhere. I learned not to look. We all learned, we have to.

I wake up and I don’t see the point in dying. I am cold and there is nothing worth it. I enter rooms and it’s all chill. Been injesting ‘somas’ since, hell, I can’t remember when I started. But the doze now is higher. Tight dress, don’t care, cab fare, no complaints just get me to the venue, my friends don’t hug, they just say ‘Open your mouth’ and then, then it is all a fog. Thank god.

It is all darkness. I float through darkness and I see you. I see you, I see you. I feel you. What tunnel? Why walk into a light if the light is me?  
No shame in anything that is natural in me. See me bleed, see my tears.
We are magic. 

Ten Shades Darker

I am ten shades darker, not one bit stronger
Hair long on flare, from time, dyes, 'don't care'
Have seen upon my reflection
I am a fog kaleidoscope, vague and vain colorful self.
Have gazed upon the magnitude of ONE, so many doors to so many  distant places, i don't have them addresses so I choose to wander with the mad instead.
I am ten times drunkest, shared my cup with them vulgar so called artists (modern Bukowskis you have no clue of the manner of a young Henry Chinaski)
'don't bother'

My skin is coarse
My courage is high,
had the lot,
been with the worst.
My spirit got rejected by
the clean, the cool, the punk, the hive,
by you.


I am ten shades darker,
sun hissed 'don't know'.
I am ten times drunkest,
raise my cup when I think of you.
I am ten times kinder,
learned to give the nasty it's proper place so you wouldn't have to deal with my rants.
I am ten times more in love for you.

Guns may blaze, I remain.
Are you a dream? Anyway, 'It's all the same'
I am a bruise, dried up, ill versed, fucked up, 'leave it at that'
I am still dancing when I dream this dream of you and me.

Let them spit when they think of me (do they ever?)
It is clear to me for when I go outside into the streets, it is no longer I carressing the heads of flower selling beggar kids, but it is them kissing my steps. (Bless them kids)

The sun may hiss and hiss
The moon sings softly into my ear.
I will make it without you
I am ALL HEART
and I know that in time above my lonely grave bracing flowers will bash
 with the sun, the moon
and them stars.

Venus tiene los ojos pesados.

Venus después de la fiesta, el único corazón roto es el suyo.
Venus planeta olvidado
duerme sin órbita.
Ha pegado sus ojos a la almohada pues teme que al despertar, sus amantes la hayan olvidado.

'Estas tan lejos Casiopea, podrías estar recostada en esta cama y tenerme entre tus brazos, seguiría sintiéndote lejana. Todas están lejos.'

Es una habitación gigante, sin muros,
una cama vieja y pequeña, ella duerme envuelta en Esmeraldas.
Abajo, no se sabe si hay piso, es una enredadera de cartuchos, y serpientes grandes que no paran de enroscarse unas con otras. Venus duerme
no sabe que mas hacer. Esta cansada de jugar.
Se niega a tomarse algo en serio. No hay con quien bailar.

Los demás dioses andan ocupados, organizando guerras, redactando teorías, construyendo puentes, inspirando a humanos, el solo pensar en tanta actividad la agota.
A veces se siente impaciente, así que se levanta y arregla su cabello,
piensa en encontrarse con Magdalena, pero al rato se da cuenta lo largo que es el viaje.
Desganada se deja morder por la serpiente criada en jardines de Amapolas, vuelve a dormir.
Musita palabras que nadie oirá.
Ella es eterna. Es una condena.

Diciembre 2, 2008
3:17pm

'What troubles me more is the sight of his back as he walks away...'

Damn

marzo 3, 2009 (no se a que va esto)


intente encajar la llave en el orifico

mi punteria suele fallar

el genero no libera mi deseo

equellas excusas ahora pueden ir al excusado

Dial 69 For Sex

Junio 12, 2012
10:48 pm

Cory lived in a single room apartment where her bed, and kitchen coexisted with all the rest. It was winter at the time though it felt like a cold spring day. The sun was distant but its rays were persistant. The small room consisted of a tiny single folding plastic table, a matching plastic chair, and a canister full of fashion magazines, twin size bed used as a couch as well, where she sat spreadily and a pink celular phone. 

Life was easy and private. She got more beauty sleep than prescribed, and had no aspirations. She found joy in the little things. Time for contemplation, enough discipline for daily body lotion application. Magazines, books, shōjo manga. Nights out for dancing, lunch with friends, movies alone. 

Her job wasn't half bad. It didn't require any sort of grooming, transportation. All she had to do was wait by the phone from 9 to 3, answer it, and make the interlocutor come. It did require attention, she was a perfectionist. She was good. The pink phone was only turned on during those hours. Body cleansed and groomed she would go for it. She had her fun. 

Numerous amounts of sexual relationships were formed during those hours. She never faked it. Which was hard with new costumers, if you don't click, you don't click. She wanted them to click and fit, fit into that roar. But most were gross, stupid men, they didn't listen. Why did they call if all they wanted was to jerk off. She went with the flow, she was always polite, she was always protected. 
She liked her regulars, they always clicked, they made her come. They were good. It was hot.

Shadow Heart. (Dec 17, 2012)

It was a fortunate moment when he decided to stay put and quiet. There was something strange going on inside her body, as he pumped her with his erection she felt this strange pressure, it was not painful but incredibly unpleasant. So they stopped, but only for a moment. Her love was a whole, his member on that moment was small. He got up from the floor where they had been laying in order to make no noise (some beds can do so much nagging.) He held his hand in front of her and helped her get up.

Lights were out.
There were shadows and sad hearts.

THORNS (what are they good for?)

i drop you a bomb but i want peace
i want your love
so i built a fort.